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One
of the first and most valuable lessons one learns in applying knowledge of
typology to relationships with others is forgiveness. You will probably
feel yourself compelled to forgive a person with whom you are having difficulty,
both for not being the way you are, and for being the way he is.
Forgiveness of the sort that will help the relationship cannot come from simply
conceding that "people are different," for everyone pretty much
"knows" that; forgiveness of a useful, constructive sort can come only
from understanding how the other person differs from yourself.
In
addition to being a certain type, each of us has certain roles to play.
These roles are absolutely unique. They can never be reproduced or
re-created. Roles are marvelous inventions that enable us to get on with
one another. We cannot live without roles. But we must not allow
ourselves to be oppressed by them, either.
Individual
humans can do miraculous and extraordinary things. We are all inheritors
of millions of years of human evolution. At the core of each of us is a
unique set of lifelong relationships and a unique configuration of
experience. There is no one else who can ever fill your role in the
same way.
-Excerpted
from Predicting the Past: Memos on the Enticing Universe of Possibility ,
by Humphry Osmond
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Until
we take how we see ourselves (and how we see others) into account, we will be
unable to understand how others see and feel about themselves and their world.
Unaware, we will project our intentions on their behavior and call ourselves
objective.
-Stephen Covey
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It
is a fact, which is constantly and overwhelmingly apparent in my practical
work, that people are virtually incapable of understanding and accepting any
point of view other than their own. In small things a general superficiality
of outlook, combined with a none too common forbearance and tolerance and an
equally rare goodwill, may help to build a bridge over the chasm which lack of
understanding opens between man and man. But in important matters, and
especially those concerned with ideals, an understanding seems, as a rule, to
be beyond the bounds of possibility.
-Carl Gustav Jung
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"Most people are so thoroughly immersed in their
personalized version of reality that it is invisible to them, much as fish are
the last creatures on the planet likely to discover water."
-The Mythic Path
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SOME
GUIDELINES
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Type
preferences are best used to understand oneself first and then to
understand others.
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Resist
stereotyping or pigeonholing individuals based on their MBTI type. Keep in
mind that within each MBTI type you will find a wide range of human
behavior.
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Remember
that type indicates preferences, not behavior. People often use behaviors
that are not based on their actual preferences to adapt to specific
situations.
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Avoid
using the MBTI alone as the basis of selection for team membership or team
task assignments. Remember that the MBTI sorts preferences; it doesn't
measure abilities.
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Use
type as a starting point for discussion and understanding, not as an end
in itself. The purpose of type is to help people recognize their own gifts
and to value those of others. It can prompt valuable discussions among
team members and lead to more effective working relationships.
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